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preface:
I am only 27 and I played FrontLine in the arcade. Enough said.
Game enthusiasts of my type are a dying breed. They've either suffered the painful deaths of their gaming lives, or have transmutated into some sort of new hideous beast. Not to say that change is bad, rather on the contrary, but damn...
Final Fantasy 7
The second coming. The miracle savior panacea cure-all. I have issues with this title, and its worshippers. I am not in any way a detractor. I think FF7 is a solid, thoroughly entertaining game. But damn...
Scads of people claim this to be the greatest RPG ever. I have only one thing to say regarding this subject. This was only your first RPG ever.
RPGs had weighty storylines and innovation long before FF7. This leads me to believe that gamers were drawn to:
Snazzy new graphics.
"Cool(shudder) factor."
Angst. (for goodness sake.)
I left the series after 7. I'm sure the subsequent games have been good. Hell, I know they have to be great to captivate the world the way they have. But wait. 50 cent is the world's most successful rapper of all time. So it only follows that his music must be great, right? Or could he possibly be the world's most savvy gangster-turned-entrepreneur? You be the judge, I say.
Devil May Cry
A game where the entire objective is to be as "cool" as possible. (Expletives deleted.)
I could go on for days, and will, in my private moments. But damn. What kind of world do we live in when people, including grown men and women, rant and rave with seething anger over the realism of their video game elves? It cannot possibly be meant that a person who has sought out the ability to role-play as an elf has limits to the cartoonish depiction of said elf. I hope everyone can hear me. Elves are not real. (Wind Waker, you're an okay guy in my book.)
On the PS3
Get the *what* outta here! 600 dollars? When something costs the same as rent, it had better be making me some *gosh darn* money. I will beat the *sheesh* out of it with a hanger, that's my word! Get your *ashy* on the *mother-hugging* street! I don't care if you're not like that! Work, *...* WORK!
Better now.
Executives don't seem to be learning. Proprietary formats? Har. Betamax? Weren't UMD movies already yanked from Wal-Mart? Hah, when Wallace refuses to ply your wares, you can count yourself out. I'm not sure if Microsoft's HD-DVD format will play in a normal DVD player, but if they do, the battle is already over. If not, the battle won't even begin. Bigwigs must not have heard that not all of us have a DVD player yet! And what's with increased storage capacity as a selling point for the casual consumer? Higher resolution in video and audio? Keep your WEGA TV and 5.1 surround system and you won't be able to experience one bloody drop more resolution. Yeah, that's right, get ready to drop thousands on a new entertainment system just to use your Blu-Ray. The only market out for increased storage capacity are the computer users, who will just buy a new optical drive without the rest of the hassle. This *sheesh* is dumb.
On the Nintendo Wii
Nintendo really lost me with the N64. I consider it (not the Saturn, you silly geese) to be the absolute worst viable console in history. Jaguar don't count, y'all. Think about it. Count the really good games in your head right now. It doesn't take both hands, does it? But being on the bottom seems to have knocked some sense into them. A console debuting at 200 bucks? Nice. Cheap game production costs? That's good too. A commitment to innovation and (hopefully) quality over new graphics engines, texture/mip/bump mapping? Starting to look sexy.
I have a question for those aged 20 and up. Did you ever go to an arcade and see one of those cabinets that you sit down at? Ms. Pac Man and Galaga were often seen in such a state. But did you ever see or play a Nintendo one? You know, the kind with multiple games on it? Tennis, Baseball, Super Mario Bros, etc. I'm not a sports nut, but I genuinely enjoyed those. They were accessible, quick, and fun. Just reflexes and timing, everybody could play them. It seems like Nintendo is going in that direction again. Good timing! We as the game generation remember these things. We as this generation now have waaaay too much to do in the course of a day to get home and memorize 50 hit combos for mediocre games. Some of us have children. What better way to play a game as a child than to use the motor skills you've just worked so hard to develop? This is my most anticipated console since the Dreamcast.
Of course, I agree with the direction Microsoft and Sony are going in, generally. New advances have to happen, and there is a definite market for ridiculously convoluted games. Some of these sure to happen games I know I'll hope to play. Without a doubt. But for those of us who hope to accomplish more in a day than learning a new moves set, the Wii seems almost perfect. Even for a crusty oldster like myself, an admitted member of a dying breed, Nintendo has the sultry curves to make me feel young again.
(P.S. A Star Wars lightsaber fighting game that utilizes the in-control speaker and rumble? OMG help me I'm there kyaaaa)
I am only 27 and I played FrontLine in the arcade. Enough said.
Game enthusiasts of my type are a dying breed. They've either suffered the painful deaths of their gaming lives, or have transmutated into some sort of new hideous beast. Not to say that change is bad, rather on the contrary, but damn...
Final Fantasy 7
The second coming. The miracle savior panacea cure-all. I have issues with this title, and its worshippers. I am not in any way a detractor. I think FF7 is a solid, thoroughly entertaining game. But damn...
Scads of people claim this to be the greatest RPG ever. I have only one thing to say regarding this subject. This was only your first RPG ever.
RPGs had weighty storylines and innovation long before FF7. This leads me to believe that gamers were drawn to:
Snazzy new graphics.
"Cool(shudder) factor."
Angst. (for goodness sake.)
I left the series after 7. I'm sure the subsequent games have been good. Hell, I know they have to be great to captivate the world the way they have. But wait. 50 cent is the world's most successful rapper of all time. So it only follows that his music must be great, right? Or could he possibly be the world's most savvy gangster-turned-entrepreneur? You be the judge, I say.
Devil May Cry
A game where the entire objective is to be as "cool" as possible. (Expletives deleted.)
I could go on for days, and will, in my private moments. But damn. What kind of world do we live in when people, including grown men and women, rant and rave with seething anger over the realism of their video game elves? It cannot possibly be meant that a person who has sought out the ability to role-play as an elf has limits to the cartoonish depiction of said elf. I hope everyone can hear me. Elves are not real. (Wind Waker, you're an okay guy in my book.)
On the PS3
Get the *what* outta here! 600 dollars? When something costs the same as rent, it had better be making me some *gosh darn* money. I will beat the *sheesh* out of it with a hanger, that's my word! Get your *ashy* on the *mother-hugging* street! I don't care if you're not like that! Work, *...* WORK!
Better now.
Executives don't seem to be learning. Proprietary formats? Har. Betamax? Weren't UMD movies already yanked from Wal-Mart? Hah, when Wallace refuses to ply your wares, you can count yourself out. I'm not sure if Microsoft's HD-DVD format will play in a normal DVD player, but if they do, the battle is already over. If not, the battle won't even begin. Bigwigs must not have heard that not all of us have a DVD player yet! And what's with increased storage capacity as a selling point for the casual consumer? Higher resolution in video and audio? Keep your WEGA TV and 5.1 surround system and you won't be able to experience one bloody drop more resolution. Yeah, that's right, get ready to drop thousands on a new entertainment system just to use your Blu-Ray. The only market out for increased storage capacity are the computer users, who will just buy a new optical drive without the rest of the hassle. This *sheesh* is dumb.
On the Nintendo Wii
Nintendo really lost me with the N64. I consider it (not the Saturn, you silly geese) to be the absolute worst viable console in history. Jaguar don't count, y'all. Think about it. Count the really good games in your head right now. It doesn't take both hands, does it? But being on the bottom seems to have knocked some sense into them. A console debuting at 200 bucks? Nice. Cheap game production costs? That's good too. A commitment to innovation and (hopefully) quality over new graphics engines, texture/mip/bump mapping? Starting to look sexy.
I have a question for those aged 20 and up. Did you ever go to an arcade and see one of those cabinets that you sit down at? Ms. Pac Man and Galaga were often seen in such a state. But did you ever see or play a Nintendo one? You know, the kind with multiple games on it? Tennis, Baseball, Super Mario Bros, etc. I'm not a sports nut, but I genuinely enjoyed those. They were accessible, quick, and fun. Just reflexes and timing, everybody could play them. It seems like Nintendo is going in that direction again. Good timing! We as the game generation remember these things. We as this generation now have waaaay too much to do in the course of a day to get home and memorize 50 hit combos for mediocre games. Some of us have children. What better way to play a game as a child than to use the motor skills you've just worked so hard to develop? This is my most anticipated console since the Dreamcast.
Of course, I agree with the direction Microsoft and Sony are going in, generally. New advances have to happen, and there is a definite market for ridiculously convoluted games. Some of these sure to happen games I know I'll hope to play. Without a doubt. But for those of us who hope to accomplish more in a day than learning a new moves set, the Wii seems almost perfect. Even for a crusty oldster like myself, an admitted member of a dying breed, Nintendo has the sultry curves to make me feel young again.
(P.S. A Star Wars lightsaber fighting game that utilizes the in-control speaker and rumble? OMG help me I'm there kyaaaa)
